There is something completely freeing about not knowing the rules, language or social mores of a country. Don’t get me wrong it is also completely unnerving at the same time but I am choosing to find the bliss in it more than the fear.

I find myself more present here than at home. Alone with my own thoughts completely focused on taking in the world around me. A silent observer. Walking down the street I pop my headphones in, crank my Beijing Beats play list and off I go! I sometimes sing out loud, dance a little while waiting for the lights or just enjoy the music. I do not care if people stare, judge or wonder because I am anonymous.

I do a lot of reflecting on these walks. Reviewing the day, the week, the past, the future. I am processing old feelings as well as the new. It is both peaceful and rejuvenating at the same time. It allows me to shake off the stress and focus on the positive.

I often tell my colleagues and friends here I feel like a 2 year old experiencing the world for the first time and find myself asking lots of questions: What is that? Why do they do that? Where does that come from? I get a lot of “Ohhhhh China you are both mysterious and beautiful!”

I stop to take pictures of things I find interesting, strange or beautiful. One thing I have found it that China is both extremely orderly with it’s rules and structure but also extremely random at the same time. Buildings, playgrounds, bikes, flowerbeds, restaurants and heavy police presence pop up or shut down over night and you never quite know what you are going to find. I enjoy capturing the memory of these things and places the first time I experience them. I often shake my head and laugh accepting that this is just China and that I am a guest or observer here!

Not knowing the culture or language is also a bit unnerving. Every time you get in a taxi you hope that you have communicated clearly enough to get where you are going. I am yet to go it alone as I do not have enough Chinese to even attempt to give directions and Google Translate only goes so far.

Ordering food is a bit of an adventure as well. First of all if it is a true Chinese place you are never really sure what you are eating. Second of all if the person takes your order only speaks Chinese and asks you further clarifying questions you attempt to answer the best you can knowing that you may not get what it is that you actually wanted. This happens to me regularly when I order Bubble Tea at my favourite spot. I have learned to just roll with it knowing that I might not get what I wanted but I will be trying something new. The only thing I discovered I could not really stomach is the Bonito Flakes that tasted like the fish food we feed our goldfish! Other than that no harm no foul!

Communicating with parents and even students is hard too. Thank goodness I am in an environment that has many people who can translate for me! I do feel vulnerable in these exchanges at times because you are never sure exactly what is being said and there are very subtle things that get lost in translation. Written communication is especially challenging and reading messages can be humorous at times. Many Chinese words have the same character but different tone and can mean multiple things so pulling out the true meaning from the written word requires some detective work.

Overall, I am embracing the oblivion and choosing to see the positive in it. I am treating every new adventure as a chance to learn something new and grow from the experience. I feel like these experiences are only adding to my resilience and will serve me well in the future!